Forgiveness.

Introspectively, I fantasize about the forgivesness I know I will never be given.

Forgive:

• to grant pardon for or remission of (an offense, debt, etc.); absolve.


• to give up all claim on account of; remit (a debt, obligation, etc.).


• to grant pardon to (a person).


• to cease to feel resentment against: to forgive one's enemies.
• to cancel an indebtedness or liability of: to forgive the interest owed on a loan.

An old episode of Oprah strayed into the myriad of my thoughtz. More than a decade ago, Oprah interviewed a black girl on her show who was mutilated by a burglar who broke into her house when nobody was there. She ended up losing an eye, her collarbone shattered, several ribz broke, and her mid-section so badly battered that she has to spend the rest of her life peeing through a tube. The girl is alive today, and she appeared on Oprah's 10 yearz later, with a glass eyeball, liver transplant, and a peebag. So was the man who did it to her, the man who caused so much pain and unaccountable misery. And she did what I believe to be something none of us have the capacity to acomplish. She looked him in the eye (with that 1 working eye of hers) and said: I forgive you. No resentment, hatred, or even the slightest hint of anger. Just pure and simple forgiveness. There is absolutely no doubt that neither you nor I, or anyone else for that matter, will have that big a heart to forgive someone for an act so heinous and beasty, utterly unspeakable.

We're all human. We all have a conscience. That's how we differentiate between what's right and what's wrong. And it is imminent for us to make some blooperz (mistakez seem like such a cliche) in our livez. It is impossible for us not to get what we want or what we need, without landing something or someone in some other form on predicament. And it truly feelz delightful to be forgiven for our actz, for our hurtful wordz and actionz. Only we know the truthz that we salt away, only we know the extent of hurt we meant to inflict. What if somewhere deep inside ourselvez, we know we could never forgive ourselvez??? Because even if the battered girl forgave the man who deformed her, how can he ever forgive himself??

Forgiving one's self, along with loving one's self, are 2 of the easiest and hardest thingz we can ever do for ourselvez~